are you ready for evo 2011?

You've got your plane ticket to Las Vegas. You've made hotel reservations. You've touched base with your roommates. You fly out soon. You're pretty much set for one of the most fun weekends of your life.

If you thought this was a review for the movie The Hangover, then you suffer from one of the following problems:

1. You don't read my blog very often. Which is okay, because this is the first post I've made in forever.
2. You don't play Street Fighter competitively. You are probably a very successful person in life.

I am kidding, of course. You can be perfectly successful in life while playing competitive Street Fighter as long as your name is something like Hajime Taniguchi, Ari Weintraub, Justin Wong, Daigo Umehara, Peter Susini, or some variation thereof, in which case you have contracts with groups who throw fairly good money in your direction to masterfully chuck a thousand fireballs and dive kick with absolute gusto at unwary opposition. The rest of you are like me, trying to find a way to balance Real Life with Hadokens, with (vastly) varying degrees of success (or failure).

The vast majority of people who will read this are people who have been to a major tournament before and know what to expect. But there are other, more inexperienced (read: stupid) souls out there that haven't had a chance to go to a big tournament. Maybe you've never been to an event of this magnitude before. Plenty of people will be popping their proverbial major tournament cherry with Evolution 2011, and a lot of these people may not feel as if they are completely ready for it. Sure, you've attended a few local tournaments where the brackets can, admittedly, get pretty big -- particularly now with the huge fighting game boom. You definitely felt like you were the master when you did alright out of that 128-man bracket at that nearby tournament in a neighboring city, where people were so packed in such a small building that you thought you were going to run out of oxygen.

If you think this is going to be like that, I have news for you: you're both somewhat right and terribly, terribly wrong.

You will definitely feel like you're about to run out of oxygen, of course. It's just that the big bracket you succeeded in won't be the entire tournament; this time, Evolution is running something close to a million 16-man brackets out of which you will have to fight your way through to get to the top. What that means is that you'll be essentially looking at hundreds of little tournaments going on in the same day in one really big ballroom, which means you will feel both completely lost and intimidated on your first day.

Even with all of that, there's nothing to not love about Evolution, but if there was something about the entire package experience that you'd have to quickly learn to hate, it would probably be the "preparation" part. No doubt a lot of you went with the cheapest possible tickets that you could get to fly with, which means a lot of your flights start at 5 AM in the morning and have a connection or three somewhere along the line and get you there at 12 PM, Vegas time (which means you've spent roughly 10 hours in a plane or in airports). Alternatively, some of you are traveling in from overseas or South America, which means your plane trip is about three times more excruciating and claustrophobic than the flights of people in North America. I can already feel your excitement.

But don't be (too) afraid! If you haven't left for Vegas yet and you've never played in a major tournament, or would just like to be better prepared than the last time you showed up to one, here are some last-minute tips that will help keep your traveling experience pleasant and keep your money from vanishing overnight during your stay in Vegas.

Keep your pack light

I remember sharing my room a couple of years ago with a semi-pro football player. This guy literally brought a huge bag in which he normally carries football gear to bring all his stuff in. While this was okay for him, because he was strong as hell -- that whole being a semi-pro football player and all -- this doesn't mean everyone is as strong as he is. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that the vast majority of people who will be playing at this tournament fall under the more conservative "not very strong at all" category. It is important then that your skinny, sun-starved ass not bring anything larger than a backpack with the bare essentials necessary to survive and an additional place to carry your joystick (either an Evo stick sack, some other small bag, or just carrying it in plain view) so as to not crush your pathetically puny back with the overbearing weight of the military-grade survival pack you originally planned to pack.

Realistically, your ultimate goal should be to completely avoid having to check in baggage so that you can skip baggage claims entirely. Most airlines will let you carry on your main bag and your joystick without too much trouble, particularly if you tell them that one is your actual carryon and the other can be considered as something that will be resting on your lap or under the chair. Not all airlines and airports are cool with this, but the vast majority seem to be. It'll be next to impossible to fit a bag with your stuff while also carrying your stick separately, so be prepared to check bags in if your "carry on" looks like it would need to pay for its own seat.

A lot of you also have trouble understanding what bare essentials really consists of. A lot of the stuff you're going to use can be actually acquired at the strip at the nearby CVS. Your very bare essentials boil down to clothes to wear, unless you're insane and like buying clothes at Vegas and then discard them shortly thereafter. So if you're a pretty normal guy, find a good-sized backpack or duffle bag that you can take as a carry on, and start with the following items:

• 2 pairs of pants / 4 pairs of shorts
• 4 shirts, preferably with one nicer shirt (decent polo or something so you look presentable if you go around in Vegas)
• 4 sets of underwear
• 4 pairs of socks
• 1 extra pair of shorts

Most people are thinking, "why not a third set of pants?" Well, because you'll be hopefully wearing a pair around in public when you get on the plane. If you're using jeans, jeans can be reused for one day without it being a massive problem unless they get dirty. If you're pretty clean, you can get away with one set for a couple of days, and if not then there's probably a place in the hotel where you can do emergency laundry. You may want to investigate this before packing two pair of pants only, if that's the case. Of course, if the amount of pants you're bringing is a problem, just pack more pants. The extra pair of shorts can be swimming trunks or athletic shorts; the goal here is that if you plan on using the pool or gym for some reason, you actually can. If not, don't bother unless you just want a cooler-temperature backup. Also, you can probably skimp on one of the shirts if you plan on making it to the tournament early enough to scoop up your attendee t-shirt, since you will be packing it on your way back.

Many people also like to bring their own towels. Towels take up a lot of space in a pack, so either go with a relatively smaller towel, or just make sure you ask for extra towels for your hotel room very, very early in your stay. Hotel rooms seem to be stocked with ~4 small-to-medium sized towels, most people use two of these for some reason. If you have 4 people in your room, get 4 more towels. Get them changed constantly, too (harass the cleaning ladies for more).

Now, let's move on to the personal hygiene stuff. This can be purchased at CVS, but sometimes it's just better to take your own in case you're really picky about what you use. Here's a suggested list with things that will be easy to fit along with your clothes:

• deodorant (antiperspirant -- no exceptions)
• toothbrush / toothpaste
• shampoo (if you use it; a small bottle will do)
• hair gel (if you use it; a small bottle will do)
• hand sanitizer (it's sold everywhere already anyways, take advantage)
• small pack of Wet Ones flushables
• louffa (get ready to get heckled for this)

Hotels provide soap, most of the time. Hotel soap also sucks, most of the time. Bring soap you like if it'll make you happier. Also, a lot of people are going to see the Wet Ones and think I'm insane. I have news for you: if people tend to say you smell like ass despite using deodorant, then chances are that it's your actual ass doing the damage. Use these after you make longer pit stops at the restroom. People who have to play with you will thank you.

Clean up before you go

Try to do this as late as you can without it making you late for your trip. If you know it takes you an hour to get to the airport and checked in, make sure you've completed all the biological needs you can handle, shaved and showered roughly about three hours before the plane leaves so that you can be at the airport about two hours early. Feeling clean will go a long way towards making your plane ride somewhat enjoyable as it'll take longer for you to feel like all the grime in the world has made its way onto your body.

Try not to eat a heavy dinner and don't eat a ton before you leave so you don't have sudden bathroom urges on the plane, or worse, in an airport in North Carolina. And if you can help it, avoid eating airport food, unless trips to the bathroom are something you look forward to. You also don't want to have an upset stomach when you get on a plane, and eating light goes a long way to alleviate that. If you think you'll have trouble with getting hungry, move on to the next step.

Bring snacks

It's completely normal to get hungry at the tournament and on the plane or in a random airport in the middle of nowhere. You'll probably need to eat something to survive, and it's not always conducive to head out and find something to eat at short notice. To curtail this, I suggest you bring with you something that's both edible and relatively filling that you can quickly eat in an emergency.

I personally recommend Clif Bars as they're good for you, have plenty of protein and a fair bit of carbs and thus will fit into most reasonable diets, and they're goddamned tasty. Extra points if you can score a bottle of 1% milk somewhere to have it with (~400-500 total calories, which is enough for a meal and will easily last you a plane ride). You will need the carbs for your mind to operate clearly and to be able to withstand what amounts to a rough bunch of hours of playing.

If you're the kind of person that can't operate in the morning without coffee (like I was when I worked at the law firm), Folgers sells these little teabag-style coffee singles that brew a cup per bag. Bring a few or snap them up at the CVS/Walgreens on the strip. Don't like Folgers? You're stuck going with those Starbucks mini-drinks, which are okay, but aren't really coffee.

Drink lots of water

Water can be purchased in bottles everywhere. There's also water fountains at a lot of places, so you can get away with buying a single bottle of water and refilling as often as necessary in between matches. You will definitely need a good amount of water, considering how ridiculously hot it is in Vegas if you decide to step outside for any reason (like enjoying Vegas outside of Evo). Also, drinking enough water will help your brain operate and help stave off that funky feeling of fatigue you'll get from playing a lot in a crowded space.

Another thing that water does a good job of is to help you regulate hunger. This means that you won't randomly get hungry, you'll just get hungry at the right times. Gatorade really isn't a replacement for water in this case because you aren't running a marathon. Try to avoid exclusively drinking soda, as tons of soda will eventually make you feel like absolute garbage.

Know where to eat on the cheap

Evolution doesn't sell food on the premises, and for the most part they do not want you to eat on tournament grounds, so know where to go to eat. Hotel food can be pretty expensive, and some people (like me) are pretty broke. So, learn what's close by. Here's a Yelp Search to get you started -- knowing where you can eat on a budget can be great if you're trying to save a lot of money.

That said, you're cheating yourself out of the Vegas experience if you don't eat at one of the great buffets. Wait until AFTER the tournament, or when you're no longer an active participant. (Or, celebrate your Evolution 2011 win by going out to the Bellagio and eating like a champion. Remember to invite me when you do.)

Clean up at the hotel, too

What, you thought that first time before you left your house was good enough for the rest of the tournament? Fat chance, slobbo. Make sure you're nice and clean before the tournament starts so that you feel great when you play and so that you're not a biohazard to the rest of the patrons. If people can spot you by your stank at a hundred paces, you need to clean up. If you take grimy deuces, that's what you packed Wet Ones for. Use them, you ass. (Around your ass, preferably.)

You don't really have to shave, but it might help you not look like a hobo by the end of the tournament. In the end, you know whether you'll need to or not.

Don't buy tons of crap

This might seem pretty obvious, but if your goal is just to go to Evolution and enjoy your time there, try not to go wild with Tourism-Influenced Stupidity and keep your purchases to a minimum. Chances are you'll get more things than you took to leave at the tournament itself, so you don't want to overload your pack with garbage that isn't necessary. If you planned on doing this in the first place, the packing guide here isn't for you: you will probably need to check bags in.

Hopefully, all of these tips can help make your trip to Las Vegas and to Evolution 2011 a smashing success. If your tournament experience sucks even after you follow all of these, then it's likely that you made the mistake of actually calling one of the phone numbers on the stripper and "massage" "services" cards that they hand out on the Vegas Strip and had one of them visit your room, leaving you with multiple different cases of STDs, the flu and broke.

I'm kidding, of course. The majority of you wouldn't know what to do with those cards anyways.